Friday, May 14, 2010

The Smackdown Lowdown! 5/14/10

Smackdown has been owning RAW since June of last year and the trend continues. Though Beth may have torn her ACL, but we get to crown a new Intercontinental Champion and hopefully Smackdown will put on a great show filled with good promos and a lot of in-ring action. So taped from Buffalo, New York, here's the lowdown on Smackdown.

We have the recap we've been seeing all week where Drew kicks the hell outta Matt Hardy and got suspended/stripped/fired. What no will the tyrant Teddy Long do this week?

Kofi Kingston beat Christian in a singles match for the vacant Intercontinental Championship via: 8/10 or 4/5 Stars
We start with "Buckle Up" Teddy Long as he announce the Intercontinental Championship match himself. And "Mr. Identity Confused" Kofi Kingston is out first. Next we have the leader of the Peepultaion, Cristian, the veteran, the favorite. Haha Kofi got monkey flipped, how racist of you WWE. But the Hip-toss, counter into the blocked hip-toss into the monkey flip was nice. Christian does his flying springboard splash on Kofi on the outside as we go to commercial. End match Kofi hits the Boom Drop and then sets up for Trouble in Paradise. Christian counters into the Reverse DDT for a two. Christian works over Kifo until he hits the Whirling Dervish of Doom for a two. Kofi leaps into the corner and wails on Christian. Het hits a flying uppercut on Kofi and sets up for The Killswitch. Kofi counters and pushes him into the corner. Christian hits him with a back kick and goes for a sunset flip into the cover which Kofi rolls out of. Both men get up and Kofi hits Trouble in Paradise OUTTA NOWHERE @7:18 for the pinfall and our New Intercontinental Champion is Kofi Kingston. But only for the moment. "The Chosen One" Drew McIntyre comes out and hands Teddy an note, and Teddy takes the TCC title from Kofi and returns it ti it's rightful owner Drewy Mac.

We come back and Matt Striker reads the note that says Teddy Longs actions were moronic and Vince McMahon overrules Teddys commandment and Drew Mac is still the ICC.

We see "The Lisp Champion" and his moving crew were unloading boxes. I bet he just bought out an estate sale and wants to show off his new junk.

Shad "Time with a 'Y'" Gaspard beat Jessie "The Baby Blue Jobber" Gavyer in a singles match via pinfall: 2/10 or 1/5 Stars
Your basic WWE squash, but the difference is the 'Y' in "Shad's Tyme". It's a game changer. Shad hits the STO, One-man high-low, for the win about 2 minutes in.

MVP/JTG beat Trent Baretta/Calen Croft "The Dude Busters" in a tag team match via pinfall: 5/10 or 2.5/5 Stars
"The Kool-Aid Packet" and "The Lone Money Money" are like Kanye and Jay-Z, sure...but not really. Nice try on the analogy though. The Busters work over JTG, the smaller, lamer of the team, with nice offense and quick, frequent tags. Looks like SD! may be trying to build a Tag Team division, I like it. End match MVP hits the facebuster and the Ballin' Elbow and Croft lands on Baretta. MVP throws Croft outta the ring while JTG hangs Baretta up on the rope into MVPs Play of the Day which gets them the win. Nice little tag match, I like tag matches, we need more good one in 2010 WWE.

Well it turns out there were a bunch of old trophies in these boxes Swagger was unloading in the back. I guess he got a really great deal at the estate sale.

The camera pans around the ring full of trophies and even a jacket and Scrabble Board as we come back from commercial and Jack Swaggers music hits and the All All American American Jack Jack comes comes down down to to the the ring ring. The push ups are back @7:52 CDT! He had the people he bought all the stuff at the estate sale bring it to the area so he could share it all with us, but more importantly the Big Show. We go to commercial mid-sentence and I'm sure he'll be talking when we come back live. Oh look he still talking, I'm like a psychic or something. He unveils a picture of him as a kid, and proceeds to say at 5 he was better than everyone's children. He gloats about being the best Eagle Scout ever and poses for the camera. Haha greatness was his neighbor and success was his best friend, and they hung out a lot. Swagger was the king of his HS and has a crown to prove it, and even took a stone cold 10, a 32-year old brain surgeon. He could dance and even lead his HS football team to their 1st state champion, and stayed true to Oklahoma State. JR would be proud. He's a swim instructor, has his own sandwich, and he's even a National Scrabble Champion. A wow-wo-we-wow, no one compares either. But Big Show begs to differ. Man whoever lived at that estate sale did a lot of great things and they had a price. (Thanks for posting Million Dollar Man) Big Show says he only out there to marvel, as he picks up the Scrabble trophy. Swagger tells him to get fat Vienna sausage fingers off his stuff. Big Show retorts with the fact his fingers are husky, and maybe big boned, but not fat. He then proceeds to break another trophy dancing with it as if he were on Dancing with the Stars. Swagger then attacks Big Show, who throws him out of the ring and the trashes all the trophies he bought. All I could think is, "There goes that $200, Jackie boy spent at the estate sale."

Layala beat Beth Phoenix/Michelle McCool in a tornado 2-on-1 handicap match via pinfall: 4/10 or 2/5 Stars
My Lord Rosa is actually working a match this is some crazy stuff. Beth gets a huge pop from her hometown Buffalo as she goes to the ring. Now Beth tore her ACL, so this is likely the last match from her for awhile. And look Rosa isn't in a match after all, cause McCool is cashing in her rematch clause. But it's a 2-on-1 handicap match. Tornado style rules McCool/Layla vs Beth. Midway through Beth picks up both of her opponents into a double Samoan drop, epic. End match Beth and Michelle knock noggins and Layla covers Beth for the win. And we have the first ever British born Womens Champion, Strikers "Lil English Muffin", in Layla. Congrats...don't f*** it up.

Kane beat Chavo Guerrero in a singles match via pinfall: 2/10 or 1/5 Stars
From beauties to the beast. Kane is his usual chipper self and Chavo talks the trash as usual as the match starts. Short match Chavo role played being a fly in this match and about 3 minutes in Kane hits the good ol' choke slam for the 1-2-3. This was one of the best matches I've seen all year. No joke......ok I'm joking.

We come back and Teddy Long gives Drew McIntyre a present. A match next week. His opponent you ask? The Big Show. A nice little warm up for him.

A run down of the Over the Limit card. It doesn't look bad at all. Should be a solid PPV.

Rey Mysterio vs CM Punk in a singles match:
Rey is out first, the crowd goes nuts, the pryo goes off, and the kiddies get free swag. Out comes CM Punk, wipes the floor, checks his watch, yells and heads to the ring. And this should be a nice little match if they give 'em 7-9 minutes. We go to commercial as Rey misses a seated senton on the outside and Punk clotheslines him right into the barricade. End match CM Punk hits the spring board clothesline for a long two. He works over Rey with a submission. Rey fights out and hits the lucha libre bulldog. The ref count beings as well. Both men up at 3, and Punk takes a boot in the corner. Rey hits the West Coast Pop, but takes a back heel kick from Punk for the two. Rey throws Punk into the ropes but Gallows stops 619 try #1. Rey gets back on track hits the 619 and the splash, only to have The Masked Menace hop in the ring. Rey is about to attack him, but it turns out to be Serena. The real Masked Menace though attacks him from behind and gives him a massive Swinging Neckbreaker. Then Gallows gives Rey the Gallows Poll, and finally CM Punk gives him the GTS. The knocked out Re is forced to pledge the SESs motto as Smackdown closes out this week.

Smackdown: 7/10 or 3.5/5 Stars
Last Week (Unofficial FJ Rating): 7/10 or 3.5/5 Stars
I love Smackdown. It always has a lot of in-ring action, it has great promos, and the commentary is 100000000000000000000xs better than Raw. This Smackdown is no different. Not the greatest action but Kofi/Christ was very very good, the tag match was ok, the Womens title match was a bit of a swerve, the Swagger/Big Show promo was long, but I like Swagger he was funny and kept me alert. And when Show hit the ring he didn't deter from the promo. Also we closed with a nice little match from arguably the two hardest workers on Smackdown in Punk/Rey with an ok ending. All in all, good promos, good matches, make for a nice watch. Keep it up Smackdown.

That's it for The Smackdown Lowdown. As always suggest to me stuff you'd like me to write on n' shizz. Also if you wanna add me on Facebook or follow me on Twitter, please do so. Really I don't mind.
http://www.facebook.com/matthewmday
http://www.twitter.com/matthewmday

I'm Matt Day and thanks for reading Fat Jesus Disciples!

No comments:

Post a Comment