We can call the Raw 6 days before Wrestlemania 25, "Video Packagefest 2010!" Cause we'd rather relive the past, than wrestle in the present apparently. Anywho, live from San Jose, it's time to lay down the Raw!
We start out with Mr. Wrestlemania, naturally, the last Raw before Wrestlemania 26. I'm excited, this card is stacked. Shawn tell us that he feels like he can do anything and he's going to beat The Undertaker at Wrestlemania. HBK then tells us not to be confused by the fact that his My Journey DVD just came out. Why? Cause he's making a Vol.2 of it starting Sunday. Just as he's about to gimmick infringe on 'Taker, the lights go out and video package (#1) of HBK's career plays on the screen. At the end of the package it said "Shawn Michaels Career 1985-2010," and apparently Undertaker minored at ITT Tech to make that for the production crew. Who knew? Cue Pete Rose to come out in his pink shirt, and boy is he nervous as all hell. Glad he wasn't on my TV much, he was quite uncomfortable. Good ol' Petey has set up Shawn in a match with Kane. He wants revenge for all the beatings he's gotten from his over the years. Nice HBK's potential last Raw match is against Kane. No 15 minute awesome-fest with CM Punk or Y2J? I'd like that. But obviously what do I know? Shawn did good and Pete was holding in from pissing himself outta fear.
We see the video package of back in 2008 when Cena/Batista met at Summerslam for the first time in a match and Cena broke his neck. (#2)
John Morrison beat The Miz (/United States Champion/Unified Tag Team Champion) via pinfall: 6/10 or 3/10
Big Show and Mr. Narcissistic himself R-Truth were on commentary. Let's just say Big Show is gold on the mic and R-Truth comes off as even more of a moron. Why make him try to talk, let him "rap" and do his stupid "Whats Up?" every five seconds. Oh there's actually a good match going on between Miz/Morrison. Miz miscalculated something and set-up JoMo to his Starship Pain for the win. Nice match, I want more of them one-on-one (no homo). Maybe for a world title? Oop, there goes me thinking again.
Confrontation between the rivals, and even though their both faces, Triple H is Super-Face, while Orton is only a regular one. They still hate each other, common enemies or not.
Another Cena/Batista video package (#3), and I don't even remember what it's about. Something with Batista cutting a great heel promo. Keep him heel please, he good at that and I actually like when he's heel.
"Identity Confused" Kofi Kingston beat Vladimir Kozlof in a Money in the Bank qualifier singles match via pinfall: 2/10 or 1/5 Stars
The guy from Africa, with the Boston accent and the Jamaican theme music get's mauled the whole match. I don't know if Cole used "Controlled Frenzy" in this match but I'm coining the term "Soviet Hammer" for Kozolf. Hope it takes off. Oh yeah Swagger was on commentary, I didn't like him in that role. I'd rather have Raw misuse his talent in the ring rather than have him suck and spit (<- Lisp joke) on the mic. Anywho we all knew Kofi was winning and he hits Trouble in Paradise for the pinfall. And the insane spots continue to grow for this year's MitB match.
We have an official announcement that Stu Harts getting into the WWE Hall of Fame this year. (#4) Nice, awesome dude, great trainer and great personality. Congrats Hart family.
Sheamus/Cody "Mr. Lisp #1" Rhodes/Ted DiBiase beat Randy Orton/Triple H in a 3-on-2 Handicap match via pinfall: 4/10 or 2/5 Stars
Teddy, and Cody cut a promo saying that it didn't matter who was going to beat Orton on Sunday as long as he lost cause their the new up and comers, and blah blah blah. Onto the match, it was too short. This could've been a nice ten minute match with some good action between the old/new superstars. But it was half that and seemed much to rushed, as most Raw matches since mid-2009. End match Orton was going for the DDT of the ropes on one of Legacy and Sheamus hit the Blarney Boot OUTTA NOWHERE for the 1-2-3.
Oh look another Cena/Batista video package. Nice. You'd think people don't watch Raw each week for some reason.(#5)
Right before Bret comes out we see a video package of of last week with Stone Cold and Bret revealed he was hurt, and blasted Vince with his cast. (#6) Bret comes out to a random "What?" chant by the crowd. Haha, I love how everybody got pissed at the crowd for that. Quit crying, your watching Raw, and expect bad. I like "What?" chants, as an FYI, no matter when their done. Bret says he glad his dad is going to be inducted to the Hall of Fame and that the whole Hart family will be at the ceremony. It'll be nice to see Owen again. I got blasted for <- that, and to them I say, hahaha. Bret said he's honored to be wrestling at a Wrestlemania again, like he did with Austin, HBK, Piper, Yokozuna, and Owen. And since we have to see Vince live on RAW, he came out at the end and simply said "Bret, one way or another, your screwed." (No homo #2) I liked the segment, Hart was great as usual, and Imma mark out for a Hart sharpshooter this Sunday.
Shawn Michales beat Kane in a single match via pinfall: 4/10 or 2/5 Stars
I swear if this is HBKs last TV it's a shame. He cold gone 10-15 with younger star and wow'd us before 'Maina. Instead we get him doing Pete Roses dirty work. As Shawn is going for the first Sweet Chin Music the lights go out, and they come back on and Undertaker choke-slams HBK as a revenge shot for Friday on the A-Show Smackdown. The lights go out again and Kane takes advantage, but we have a vintage HBK kicks-out of a finisher. Kane gets him up and looks like he's going for a running power-slam, but HBK slips out the back and hit the super-kick for the win. Nice, HBK's looks ready for Wrestlemania and so am I.
Here's some more Cena/Batista video package action. (#7) It's like their in a main event match at Wrestlemania and somehow we all missed the build up all the last four weeks. Crazy.
Christian and Pete Rose were talking in the back. Their happy that he finally got revenge on Kane. Leads to Kane with a betting pun and "beating up" Rose behind closed doors and Christian listens. Isn't it illegal to not report rape or assault. Oh well it's WWE, the only rules that matter are the Wellness Policy and don't wake Vince after 10:30.
"Ms. Necrophiliac" Michelle McCool (Womens Champion)/Maryse (Divas Champion)/Layla beat Gail Kim/Beth Phoenix/Eve Torres-Day in a diva 3-on-3 tag team match via pinfall: 1/10 or 0.5/5 Stars
Kelly Kelly whose only eye candy, and Mickie James-Canton are at ringside behind the face divas while Vickie and Alicia were behind the heel divas. And the match took about as long as it took for me to write the last sentence. McCool did do a nice counter into a Styles Clash (Thanks for posting AJ Styles)...err um Faith Breaker for the pinfall. Still no diva match at Wrestlemania, so no boob break this year. I'm not gonna be happy not seeing eye candy for 4 hours.
Another Cena/Batista video package is shown. (#8) It's if they've been feuding for years, it's been three weeks. Maybe four weeks, whatever.
Batista and Cena's Final Face-Off
Batista and his Goldberg-style security come out to the ring and he cuts a nice heel promo, as he's been doing, axing us fans cause he knows he the bad guy. Cena came out all calm and I never got the feeling that he was going to start yelling (I was amazed). Typical Cena promo, but he got Batista hot by calling him a coward. They've been using "coward" in storylines a lot lately. Weird. The brawl ensued and Batista bailed early, he kicked the steps and broke his toe in the process. The crowd is going nuts (I wouldn't complain, this build up is quite good). And we Video-Packagefest 2010 Part 1 with utter chaos.
Raw: 6/10 or 3/5 Stars
Last Week: 7/10 or 3.5/5 Stars
There was 8 in-show video packages, and five of them were for Cena/Batista. It was insane. Instead of wrestling leading into Wrestlemania we're recapping feuds. I guess it works, kind-of. The crowd was in for a long night too cause they taped all four shows there that night. Anywho Miz/Morrion and HBK/Kane were alright and the packages weren't bad, just too many of them. I'm still excited for Wrestlemania, despite this show, I know you are too. I hope.
That's it for Layin' Down the Raw. As always suggest to me stuff you'd like me to write on n' shizz.
Thanks for reading Fat Jesus Disciples!
No comments:
Post a Comment